When I began to journal and blog about hiking the Appalachian Trail, I promised that I would keep my readers informed as expeditiously as possible. This past week since returning home, I have been silent because there was nothing much to report. I saw my primary care doctor who took x-rays of my knee and foot. The knee remains a little swollen from the fall on May 7th with retention of fluid; the foot showed no stress fracture but my right foot looks a little different from my left (the 4th toe is separated and I can't bend my toes on that foot).
It's been a strange transition to go from walking 10-14 miles a day on the Appalachian Trail, following the white blazes to sitting/laying on the couch inside my home and walking as little as possible. There are no white blazes in my home. So, what have I been doing to pass the time? I've been looking at the pictures and videos I have taken on the traiI. At some point I want to make a slide show/video set to music. I have been following blogs and trail journals of people I have met on the trail and praying for them. I have watched some television in the evening. I have been reading two books -- Hinds' Feet on High Places Devotional (The Original and Complete Allegory with Devotional) by Darien B. Cooper and Imperfect Spirituality: Extraordinary Enlightenment for Ordinary People by Polly Campbell. In a way the books compliment one another. Both speak to me about my present "sidelined" situation. They have become white blazes. God has marked this trail for me too; His blazes are in the Bible as well as in the books.
Polly Campbell uses the story below in the introduction to her book. I wonder how God might be using my idleness as I wait for my foot and knee to heal? Like the pot, I am broken.
The Broken Pot
A water bearer in India had two large pots, each hung on an end of a pole which he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it, and while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the masters house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.
For a full two years this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water in his masters house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do. After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream.
"I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you." "Why?" asked the bearer. "What are you ashamed of?" "I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your masters house. Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work, and you don't get full value from your efforts." the pot said.
The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot, and in his compassion he said, "As we return to the masters house, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path." Indeed, as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path, and this cheered it some. But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again the Pot apologized to the bearer for its failure.
The bearer said to the pot, "Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of the path, but not on the other pots side? That's because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you've watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my masters table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house."
Each of us has our own unique flaws. We're all cracked pots. But if we will allow it, the Lord will use our flaws to grace His Father's table. In Gods great economy, nothing goes to waste. Don't be afraid of your flaws.
Acknowledge them, and you too can be the cause of beauty. Know that in our weakness your strength is made perfect. (2 Corinthians 12:9)
In the days ahead, as I continue to wait on the Lord, wait on the MRI and for my body to heal, I'll share reflections that have nourished my spirit from both books. I don't know what the future holds for me concerning the Appalachian Trail but God knows and I am content to wait on the Lord.
Wonderful reflection...oddly enough I have meditated on both of these concepts but your writing has made them so beautiful to my eyes.
ReplyDeleteTrail or no, keep writing.